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Creating a god shaped space

23/7/2015

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Well, it’s official. I am the world’s worst evangelist. At one point on the Pride stall on Saturday, I said to one of our volunteers “Don’t mention God.” It is an interesting dilemma ministering in the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered communities. On the one hand, there is profound hurt and pain which has been inflicted on our people by the institution and some of the individuals that make up the Church. On the other hand, there is an equally profound yearning to belong and to explore what it means to be a spiritual person. I take the view that is not my job to make people believe in God. It is God’s job to make people believe in God. It is my job, my vocation and my joy to create spaces where people can become open enough for them to feel God’s presence, or at least go to a deeper place. Sometimes, this is just a moment in a conversation where the tone of an ordinary chat shifts and we start to talk about the things that are really on that person’s heart. I think of these moments as ‘holy listening.’ There is almost a change in the atmosphere, as the Holy Spirit starts to weave and dance in and out of the conversation. In these moments of revelation, the individual may have tears in their eyes or may go quiet, becoming deep in thought. My role is to keep that silence, that space, just letting God do God’s work. These are blessed moments indeed. Sometimes we are able to create the space for a whole group of people at one time. This is why we worship together on a Sunday. It might not happen for us every week, but we know from experience that worshipping together opens up a space where God can get in and touch us, in midst of our everyday lives.

Once again this year, Northern Lights MCC organised and led the Pride Candle Lit Vigil. This really captures the dilemma I mentioned at the beginning. We are asked to do a ‘religious thing’, perform a ritual, bring people together, create a ‘sacred space’ and yet we also have to manage the pain that people feel when anything to do with God or church is mentioned. Before the vigil, a young man spoke to me about how he lost his job in a church organisation, once he came out as gay. His eyes filled up as he revisited that painful time. It must have taken courage and trust to tell me his story. Despite that pain, injustice and rejection, he was at the vigil, his longing overcoming his pain. I can’t heal that young man’s heart. I can’t bring him to a place of peace. I can’t make him believe in God again. Those are all God sized jobs. What I do know, is that our ministry as Northern Lights MCC really does make a difference and really does offer a place and a space for people to experience God’s amazing grace and love. It is a shared ministry, with each of us able to play our part. Each of us helps to hold the space, so that God can touch and change lives – one person at a time. Happy Pride!

God bless,

Cecilia

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